When 1-3 feels almost OK...well sort of.......

That's about the most ringing endorsement that I can give the Browns' at the quarter-way mark of the season.

It was either that or "Mo Must Go" (And no, that's not a Clarrett to prison referrence)

But, I figured after the first win of the season I might as well take a stab at the upbeat. (And no, that wasn't a University of Northern Colorado backup punter referrence)

However, a win on the road is a win on the road in the NFL. When you are not a very good team, which, in most cases, I think applies to this rendition of the Browns, you take them when you can get them. Especially when Carolina looms on your schedule. Especially more so when Leigh Bodden limps off the field, to join Cutch and Gary "by the end of my contract you'll have paid me about 2 million for each game I actually appear in" Baxter milling about the training room.

That leaves the men in orange helmets with Davin Holley and Ralph "12 yard cushion" Brown as the starters for Week 5. On the road. Against Steve Smith and MeShawn Johnson.

(On a side note, Steve Smith was last seen trying to purchase a Delorian in an effort to make Sunday afternoon get here RIGHTNOW)

Again, on the bright side (see, I'm trying, I really am), Rueben ran for 100 yrds (against an awful defense) Charlie threw three touchdowns (oh, and the worst interception I've EVER seen. On any level. By any QB. Really. I'd like to take a shot at watching every pick Ryan Leaf ever threw and see if there are any that are worse in there. I think it's a long shot.) Hey, even the defense mustered thismuch of a pass rush.

All that being said, I still know who we are. We're a football team that doesn't make enough plays, doesn't have enough talent, and still needs an offensive coordinator that understands basic football.

And a razor for that awful thing growing under Charlie Frye's nose.

Hey Roger Brown, Just Leave!

Roger, your article in today's Plain Dealer is why everyone that has something to do with sports in Cleveland doesn't respect you and why Cleveland sports personalities refuse to speak to you. Please do us all a favor and go back to writing a gossip column about who's fucking Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan. No one cares when a "gossip" writer makes up stuff about that. Your article today blasts Browns GM Phil Savage and calls for him to be fired. This is ludicrous. NFL experts who are far more qualified than you have stated that Savage is an excellent talent evaluator and has done a good job in attempting to change the losing attitude in the Browns locker room. These experts include Peter King at Sports Illustrated and the stable of writers at ESPN including Chris Mortensen, Len Pasquarelli & John Clayton. What is accomplished by blasting D'Qwell Jackson & Willie McGinest after one game? Yes, McGinest is on the downside of a stellar career. He was brought here because of his leadership skills, knowledge of Romeo's defense and to tutor our young linebackers. D'Qwell is a rookie. He was rated by numerous draft services as one of the top 2 or 3 inside linebackers available in the draft. He is learning how to play in a 3-4 defense, which he did not do in college. As usual, your article shows that you have no business writing about sports and that you continue to make up information just to get a reaction. If that's your only goal, why don't you leave town and go join Skip Bayless on the west coast. Before you leave, go check out "Why your hometown columnist sucks" on deadspin.com. The Plain Dealer sports section would be better off without you.

The Fraud Continues!

Just a quick thought. I'm watching Yankees-Red Sox right now, (well, it's either that or preseason Colts-Seahawks, what do you expect?) and who comes up in the 6th with a runner on 3rd and one out, with his team down by one? A-Fraud.

Now mind you, Schilling is getting tired, a fact that was exacerbated by the rain delay, I'd think, and this is what I would consider a somewhat important situation. So what's he do? Pops up the first pitch.

There's your 2005 AL MVP, kids. I think his testicles were last spotted on the expressway back to NYC.

All About this Week

(Or Rather: Since noboyd has bothered to update this blog all damn week!)

There's only 4 more days till Madden comes out, though I won't be able to enjoy it until a week from today, thanks to the grace of finals.

Even though he's not in the league anymore, apparently there was a way to get Mo' Clarett into the game after all!

The Tribe was quietly playing well, but then the Twins and their pitching staff of doom came to town and scrapped 2 out of 3 from us. Oh yeah, and Fausto Carmona blew another game in the process.

Oh, and the Browns lost ANOTHER CENTER. At this point, I know the Eagles might might might be willing to let Hank Fraley go, knowing that he's in a walk year, so really, I don't mind giving up a day 1 pick for him. I know that's kinda crazy, but we need a competent human being there. Of course, if Ross Tucker works out, feel free to kick me in the balls.

I know Phil keeps getting on the pulpit, banging his fist and saying "we won't accept that negative attitude around here" About all the things that go wrong, but really, between going through 3 centers in 3 weeks, the Suggs thing, and the other stuff (Baxter's injury, AGAIN), you almost have to think at some point he's looking in the mirror going "Man, these people aren't so fucking crazy after all"

Also, in case the Cavs do decide to trade Dijon Jones (Damon to the layperson) At least we'll still have our own brand of crazy here, he just won't be wearing leopard print suits.

I Wonder

When Maurice Clarett was arrested this morning in Columbus was he

A) Just carrying those guns and wearing a bulletproof vest to protect himself since OSU wouldn't provide him with a body guard

B) On his way to a gang meeting with Lawrence Phillips, Marcus Vick, and Chris Henry

or

C) On his way to a Cincinnati Bengals tryout.....

And what the hell is he still doing in Columbus anyways? How many times does he have to get arrested there before he realizes it's trouble for him to be there?

While we're beating on Dolan ...

Wow! I knew Fausto's numbers were bad - but I guess until you actually see it written down on paper you cannot truly appreciate them. So, while I do not blame him (YET), because he is still a kid learning the ropes, who by the way has some wicked movement on his pitches (reminiscent of when Colon was actually thin and successful with the Indians), I can blame Dolan, Wedge and of course Shapiro.

We all know that come trade deadline there are only two types of teams in baseball - buyers and sellers. The Indians, in case anyone has not noticed their record - which is much worse than cult-classic Dolemite could ever hope to be - is AWFUL. While it does not help to be in the American League Central, where the only team that looks worse than a fully-nude Estelle Getty is the Royals, the Indians play their fair share of games against the rest of the so-so teams in the League. So,as a seller in a year where there is a surprisingly high amount of parity the Indians decided to move some players.

Trade 1: Bob Wickman for Atlanta 3-baseman turned catcher Max Ramirez. If you have never heard of him join the club - he is hitting a hefty .285 in A ball. However he has managed to hit 9 homers this year against pitching that is probably no better than what you will see in any college game.
(This trade gives the Indians a catcher that is at best 3 years away from the majors - and from what Atlanta had to say about him - is more likely 5-6. By the way, unless we plan on moving Victor to 1st base to cause a log-jam there with Hafner and Garko ..... we are not doing ANYTHING to help the team).

Trade 2: Ronnie Belliard for Hector Luna. This trade is interesting because as soon as Belliard was traded we started talking about trying to get him back in the off-season? So, if we want him back - can I assume he is a good ball-player? The other thing that really gets me is that Luna is a good hitter - with a s0-s0 glove. BUT ....
the Indians claim that we traded for him to get some additional utility players. Excuse me, but I thought that the point of a utility player was to move in as a "defensive" replacement!

Trade 3: Ben Broussard for Shin Soo Choo. I do not know what to make of this trade. Broussard was never going to be an every day first baseman for us. However, apparently our platoon of Eduardo Perez and Ben Broussard was good enough for now. Or at least Seattle thought so .... they traded for both of them.

All I know is that we gave the Braves a proven veteran pitcher, the Cardinals an everyday second-basemand with a nice stick to add to the line-up and handed the Mariners ANOTHER first-baseman to help them against right-handed pitching? If we do not get Marte and Garko in here everyday ... I am going to go crazy. Also, can we take Jason Davis out of the closer role and give Carmona some more time. I have seen Davis blow games for the INDIANS for what seems like 10 years!!!!! Carmona had a bad - OK, very bad - 2 week period for us. Lets get real.

In conclusion, I can only wait to see who we bring in next year for just above the league minimum to STINK too. Hollandsworth was never and will never be good. After all, the Indians could have probably traded Broussard, Hollandsworth and WIckman for Carlos Lee - since the poor Brewers only got a career AAA player in Lance Nix and a closer that is even less reliable than Wickman in Cordero. Wow ---- for a second there I had visions of an outfield with Carlos Lee and Grady SIzemore ..... with those two guys you can afford to have someone like Casey Blake platooning in the other slot. If only Carlos Lee did not want to get payed like a GOOD ballplayer .... maybe Dolan's CHEAP ASS would have thought about it.......

Suicide Watch: Fausto Carmona

Poor Fausto Carmona.

Really, at this point how can you not feel bad for a guy?

Figuring that we've got almost a month before the Buckeyes or anyone else kicks off the season, the fact that the Browns are still early in training camp, and LeBron is somewhere toiling in Asia right now, you've got to think that Fausto Carmona has pretty bad timing.

Let's face it, the kid has had a pretty bad week. During the one time of the year where nothing else is really going on in this town sportswise.

And when I say a pretty bad week, I don't mean like "lost your dog, got in a fight with the girlfriend, and got a flat tire" Proportionally, his week on the mound has been somewhat the equivalent of "Got carjacked, your wife left with the theif, and you walked home to find your house on fire"

Here's the cumulative of his four appearances, starting with a loss July 30th against Seattle:

4 appearances, 2 2/3 innings pitched, 11 earned runs, 4 walks, 4 strikeouts, and 2 home runs allowed.

Oh, did I mention he's taken the loss in all four of those games, and blew 3 saves along the way? No? Well I just did.

In that stretch, his ERA has gone up almost 2 full runs. His pitches have been flatter than a 6th grade girl. And, I'd have to imagine that his self confidence is for shit right about now. The problem though? We don't have anyone else. In the effort to save a million bucks or so, team owner Larry The Cheap(est) Dolan ordered closer Bob Wickman traded to Atlanta.

By the way, Wickman, since the trade, has made six appearnces, picking up 5 saves. He hasn't allowed an earned run. By the way, we got a catcher who's toiling away in single A, and who just moved to catcher from third base because he couldn't hit enough to play third in the Atlanta orginization. I'm just saying.

So what will Eric Wedge do? The same thing he always does when things start going wrong. He'll f'ing stand there and chew on his bottom lip and look generally like a dope. Maybe he can grow the moustache again and blame this whole abomination of a season on his evil twin, like they do on the soap operas.

At least in the off-season, the owner will give GM Mark Shapiro some room to make a move, spend some money, and upgrade the bullpen, just like he did last year. Oh, wait, no he didn't, and no, he won't.

Leading Off.....

So.

Here it is.

I kept saying that I was going to start a sports blog, so here it is. As far as the focus of this whole thing, well, I, and the rest of the contributors that we'll have will be Clevelanders for now, so I suppose that it'll be mostly about sports around here.

Then again, when things are relevant, or newsworthy, or just plain funny, they'll get their due around here. We'll see where it goes from there......